In the darkest hour the soul is replenished and given the strength to continue and endure. -Heart Warrior Chosa
Two years today. How do I feel? A quiet sadness. One endures what they would rather change and I am reminded today that I would reverse the universe if I could to have one more day with Shawn. I continue in my journey because my hope is in God. I continue on my path because Shawn’s love inspires me. I continue moving within a given day because my children move and jump and invite me to play along.
Continue and endure. The two words go together. Loss does not allow these words to be separated.
Loss is a constant work of healing and restoring. I don’t believe I will be able to say I am healed in the sense of past tense until I walk through heaven’s gates. Like the song writer states in his most famous hymn, "It is well with my soul," my spirit longs to sing these words. And one day I confidently believe I will be able to say it is well with me. This is different from saying things are better. Instead, my hope is to agree they are well. Not forgotten. They are well. Not less painful. They are well. Not excused. They are well. More accepted. They are well.