I was driving home alone from church tonight and decided to
call my sister from my cell phone. I
used to love driving in the car with Shawn. It was a favorite time to talk, catch up, dream, explore new ideas and
rehash old ones. Now I find my drives
can often be long and lonely.
The conversation with my sister was thought provoking. She shared with me something she had learned
at her church service earlier in the evening. It was the idea of being thankful for what we have instead of dwelling
on what we don’t have. She mentioned the
word “deficit” to me and it brought one of Shawn’s philosophies to memory. Shawn believed in what he called the “abundance
theory” meaning there is always enough to go around; enough of ourselves to
share, enough time to take and enough love to give. He taught me that people who are often
uptight, possessively hording what they have or living in bondage to selfishness, practice a “scarcity” mentality. This state of mind basically scares them into
believing they will be deprived because this world can not possibly have enough
of what they want to go around.
As I reflected on this “cup-half-full” mindset that my
sister was advocating, I sensed a stirring inside myself. It is easy for me to see what I don’t
have. Shawn encompassed so many of the “haves”
in my life, that life without him can easily appear incomplete in most aspects
and limited at best. What comfort to
know that loss can not take away all God has given for me to have and
I have great friends who take me out for dinner and enjoy
being with my kids.
I have amazing friends who listen to me ramble and talk for
I have beautiful children who share immeasurable love with me and
I have use of all my senses to recognize and savor the world
I have gifts to share that bring a smile and comfort to many whom I encounter.
I have a confidence instilled that God ultimately rules with
justice and mercy.
I have experienced God’s grace at heightened degrees.
I have experienced God and know He is real.
I have a sister who will talk with me on my cell phone until
I reach home.