Do Try

It is common sense to take a method and try it.  If it fails, admit it frankly and try another.  But, above all, try something.  -Franklin D. Roosevelt (1882-1945), 32nd U.S. President

So much of what I try seems to fail lately.  Let’s see—where does my list begin? 

  • Trying to lose ten pounds.
  • Trying to make it to music practice with childcare coverage.
  • Trying to stay positive.
  • Trying not to compare my situation to those around me.
  • Trying to let go of perfectionism.
  • Trying to let go of impressing others.
  • Trying to let go of worrying about what others think.
  • Trying to enjoy my kids when they are spilling popcorn seeds all over the floor.
  • Trying to remember the joy of Shawn not the sadness of his absence.
  • Trying to accept my life more than just grow accustomed to it.

If I would have written his entry yesterday it would have probably ended here.  But, today is not yesterday and thankfully after seven consecutive hours of sleep, I feel a bit strengthened.

I have found it to be true that the best therapy for loss is to do something with the grief. Nearly anything is better than nothing.  Of course, I am speaking of healthy engagements versus abusive “fixes” such as drinking, over-eating, sleep deprivation, drugs, obsessive shopping, etc.)  And I also don’t advocate becoming busy or over-committed just for the sake of filling up one’s schedule.  Doing something could be as simple as making a cup of coffee. 

Without a set plan, this is how my day began:

  • I exercised this morning.
  • My mom offered to stay with my kids Thursday night for me to attend music practice.
  • I read Mr. Roosevelt’s quote above and felt inspired.
  • Today I am thinking about my story and not someone else’s appearance of a better story.
  • Today my desk is a mess with mail and such, and I am choosing to journal anyway.
  • These first five accomplishments impress me.
  • I am not worried about who else I need to impress today.
  • Maddi attempted to sweep the popcorn and Jordan put the bowl in the dishwasher. That I enjoyed.
  • I dreamt last night of Honduras and Shawn. He was real for the minutes he appeared. What joy!
  • Acceptance is a big word for me.  I think nine out of ten tries is good for today.  I am okay with this one staying on the list for awhile longer.

So back to the theory.  Do something.  Try something.  Do try.

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