There are a hundred paths through the world that are easier than loving.  But, who wants easier?  -Mary Oliver

People have asked me after two years of walking through grief, "Does it become easier?"  I think what they are really saying isn’t actually a question at all rather a wishful hope to make us all feel better.  It seems to be a secret code phrase for saying, "I want you to be better.  I don’t want you to be in such devastaing pain." 

But, the truth is loss will always hurt.  It will always be a memory that connects us with saddness.  I think then my answer to the question is, "loss does not become easier – I become more used to it."  And as I continue to let it have its way in me and walk through the healing process I have an acute awareness of what really matters around me and can ensure my time is better spent on things that matter like loving those who are close to me and daily holding onto hope and finding faith even during the darkest moments.

In the long run, I believe wholeheartedly it is better to love with all its heartache and hard work than to live a life absent of love only in the end to say it was easier on me.  Easier can never equate to the rich value of true love.

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