I never imagined a visit to the eye doctor could be so therapeutic. Today I went in for a routine exam. I made my appointment at a new clinic hoping to find a doctor closer to my home. It came as a total surprise that I found not only an eye physician but a pseudo-psychologist as well. The doctor greeted me with care and concern. He was sincerely moved by my experience; something he had followed in the news. He was genuinely kind and precisely clear in his condolences. I was amazed to be recognized.
While putting drops in my eyes to dilate the pupils, he paused to tell me “Jennifer, the most important thing right now is to heal. You need to do every nice thing you can for yourself to make this happen. We want to do something to help you in your healing process and don’t even know what or how to begin. But, as a community we want to make sure you are healing. That is what Shawn would want, right? Shawn would expect this from us. He would want us to take care of you and make sure you are doing everything possible to promise healing.”
My tears blended with the eye drops. I wondered if the doctor could tell the difference. I was moved by his sentiments and bewildered by the fact that nearly five months after the accident my family has not been forgotten. I hadn’t really thought before about what Shawn would want. And in that moment, during a simple office visit, I was stirred by the idea that my husband would want to guarantee my well-being. This message both accurately and boldly spoke to my spirit. Shawn always wanted the best for me and would go to great measures to please me. I remember him often telling me, “Jennifer, my main goal in our marriage is to make you happy.”
I was told recently that “love is the highest form of self-communication”. My experience today clearly communicated to my truer self. I felt Shawn’s love speaking to me as only love can speak…strong, precise, true, and bold.
